can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Randomize
