Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
It's official drugs can't kill me
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
There are leaves in my underwear?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
