I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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