friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize