Fine. I'll sleep in my office
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
