party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
