and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...