If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
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My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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