If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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