She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
