Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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