Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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