try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
