so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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