i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I have aggressive nipples.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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