my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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