then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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