didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
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Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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