Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
