i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Randomize