oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
