I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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