Taylor Swift is so right about you.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
