would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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