i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
