bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
