Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
