Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
