It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
