carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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