ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
