all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
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