Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize