Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Randomize