fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
