another moral hangover. fuck.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
