Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
i came on her dog
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
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