She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
