i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Randomize
