So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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