So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
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It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
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also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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