how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
