Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
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It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
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We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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