If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
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