It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Randomize
