I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Blood and glitter go together right?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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