I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
