Yo dont text me then not text me
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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