Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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