literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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