Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
